“So, when am I meeting your girlfriend?”
I looked up from my phone, looked right, looked left and then right again. Seeing as it was just two of us in the living room, I gave her one of my many blank “looks”. (I have different types of looks but this particular one is Classic. A raised eyebrow, squinted eye, the other enlarged, set jawline and lips in a thin pout and a tilted chin). Her been my Mother.
“I didn’t know you had a twin”
“Oh Mother, not now. I’m still a young chap. I don’t even have a job. I’ve not even served my country yet. Why the rush?”
“Why the rush? Kishi, you’re my only child and I’ll need to see my grand children fast.
I just looked at her smiled. I smiled till it reached its orgasm. The sound of my laughter caught her off-guard. I could see that her anger was seething so I raised the volume of my laughter and fell to the floor while staring at her dead on.
Then She did it. She called my name in full (She calls my full name when she is about to to raise the roof).
“ITEOLUWAKISHI ADE… This is serious business, how dare you take this with levity? Ehn?”
I just looked at her. I laughed a little more, got up, walked up to where she was seated and kissed her on the forehead and said “We’ll be fine Mother”.
I just love that woman.
This write up isn’t about the conversation with my mother (in a way, it is) but its about how i have decided to wait for the one. Yes, the one. Most singles today rush headlong into relationships knowing fully well that they aren’t ready. We rush into it based on how we feel (lonely, depressed, desperate, “follow-follow”, my-friend-is-in-a-relationship-and-I’m-not Syndrome).
Whatever happened to waiting? Whatever happened to trusting God? Whatever happened to grooming yourself up for your man/woman and a good home?
Whatever happened to making yourself the virtuous man/woman equipped with handling both work, your Hubby and your home and placing them all in God’s hollow?
Whatever happened to the woman drenched in Proverbs 31 and the man basking in Job 29?
What has happened?
What is happening?
What will happen?
If there is one thing people in our generation hate to do, it is to wait. And why should we? We can Google questions rather than wait for an answer. We can order shoes online rather than suffering the long weekend lines at the retail store. We can even book reservations ahead of time rather than waiting for a table at our favourite establishment. We love the quick and easy way of doing things. – Like snapping our fingers and the paycheck appears or clapping our hands and the light comes up. Fast Action.
But God doesn’t operate any faster in the twenty-first century than He did in the first. And so while we rush ourselves, we can’t rush God. In fact, much of life is spent waiting.
Abraham waited twenty-five years before his wife Sarah gave birth to their first child.
Joseph slogged through thirteen years of betrayal, false imprisonment, and abandonment before assuming the leadership of Egypt.
Moses spent forty years tending sheep before God called him as a deliverer of His people.
David spent fourteen years before the throne of Israel would be his.
And in Jesus’ own ministry, he often told his disciples “My hour has not yet come.”
Waiting is not incidental to faith. Waiting is the DNA of faith.
A single man or woman should prepare himself or herself for marriage while he is single by reading good relationship books.
There’s a waiting process… My Co-host Eyiyemi Olivia said on our show few weeks back “What we do during this waiting process is to prepare ourselves as Christians for the harvest with words of thanksgiving (which we fail to do almost always) and shielding yourself with the selfless assurance of Him (God) bringing into existence, his promise, his word (here, doubts eats at us and we find other means to quench the thirst of the waiting Process). View your time in the Waiting Room as a season of growth and development and you’ll find you’ll be that much more ready for your moment on the stage”.
And as a Single person… Grow your relationship with God, grow your Bank Account and groom yourself.
God need’s you in his vineyard. You should work and not be distracted about his promises. He knows you need a partner to cherish you like He does. He knows what tugs at your heart. He doesn’t expect you to hop about, test-running every individual that comes your way like a model does with clothes during a fashion show. God expects you to work with the “Talents” He gave you before sending you to earth (Nobody wants a broke partner, man or woman). You shouldn’t sell your IOTA for a QUATER.
And yes, truthfully our biological clock is ticking and we get bullied by peers and family because they think they know what is right for us. But hey, you and I serve the Author of time. Don’t let them berate you with the comparism they matter-of-factly state at family engagements, meetings and parties. They don’t own you. God does. Do you, Do God.
I see no reason why people (single people) settle for less. Why you rush into a relationship that isn’t in God’s plan for your life beats me (three days into the relationship, we start regretting). Just because you attend weddings every Saturday doesn’t mean your own Saturday won’t come.
Enjoy your “singlehood”. It’s not a disease. Don’t go with the norms of popular culture.
This applies with every area of one’s life. Whatever you need, whatever you’re expecting, patiently wait on God. Remember, life is just a pot of beans… One day, the beans will be ready and served with the right china plates.
WE WILL WAIT…
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